Fuck

From: Writer 

Sent: March 30, 2013 3:12 PM

To: Panic

Subject: Fuck

You are playing in the big leagues and although I can’t totally understand your anxieties, I recognise hints of the feelings of self-doubt you express. I don’t know…I’m not sure it will ever go away or that it is a bad thing if it does not go away. Maybe it’s the secret fuel of ambition.

I remember being filled with tonnes of self-doubt and anxiety in my mid to late 20’s. People around me said I always appeared confident but I was convinced that the system was set up to personally screw me over. I knew I could do the aid work job well but could never catch a break, or did not have the right training or know the right people or whatever and just could not get ahead. At some point though, I caught a couple of breaks and eventually started to wonder if those above and ahead of me might also have similar anxieties of their own.

Looking back I realized I hadn’t actually done too badly during those years and maybe those anxieties might have been pushing me along.

Anxieties aside, you are where you are today because you deserve to be there – you earned your way to this point. I have no doubts you won’t keep moving ahead.